During the Lenten season, I usually go to church services every Wednesday night. It is a time of blessing, as I reflect, draw nearer to God and leave all my burdens behind. Last night, I did the same thing; only it wasn't in church, it was in an Italian restaurant off the Strip.
A friend of mine from grade school was in town. Although I knew I was missing church and felt slightly guilty, I also knew that the opportunity to see her was rare; and I wanted to do that more than attend church; so, we met up for dinner.
We had an opportunity to talk -- really talk. We had not seen each other for more than five years. I didn't realize she didn't know the circumstances of my divorce and she did ask me about it; not to pry but just to see how I was doing. I did what I usually did, and told the story -- the whole story. The unabridged version.
When I finished, I felt God telling me, "Okay. That's it. You no longer need to tell your story." You see, I have retold this same story countless times. It no longer has emotion, it is no longer cathartic. It is just a story. Yes, it is part of my life but it is in the past. Retelling no longer serves the purpose it once did, which was to heal. Now, it is just a recounting of my past.
I didn't have a rock last night -- I had a boulder that was chained to me and holding me back. It is one that has pressed down on me for years. I handed that one over to God. He told me "It's time. Let go of the past. Redefine yourself. You are no longer that person; you are new in Me."
So, God now has my burden. It was handed to him in that little Italian restaurant. I found God in a "hole in the wall". I also rediscovered friendship and bonding over a glass of wine and some fabulous ziti.
Lent continues to be a time of reflection and a communion with God. It may not always be as we plan but rather, as He plans. Each day is new. We are new, as we continue to grown in Christ. It was a blessed evening. Thank you God for that time of renewal and friendship. And most of all, thank you for taking away all of my burdens, for reminding me that I am no longer the person I was 32 years ago or even a year and a half ago. Most of all, thank you for reminding me that you are bigger than the walls of a church. God is everywhere; we just have to know where to look.
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