Rainy Day Reminder

Today is one of those days where it is absolutely pouring rain.  I love it!  The doors are open and the air is fresh!  It is a reminder to take it easy.

It has been a busy month.  I cannot believe April is over.  It was a flurry of moving and work.  Little time for socializing.  There was (and still is) much to be done.  But today it's as if God gave me permission to just "kick back".  He knew I wouldn't otherwise; you see, I'd had a garage sale planned for today. "Be..."

Thursday, I was home from work...a casualty of overwork.  A migraine headache that escalated from pain to full-blown nausea.  I had to stop for the day.  I rested all day and watched silly reality shows.  Yesterday, I went back -- full-speed ahead.  Another casualty of stress?  Cold sores.  Despite taking a preventative dose of Valtrex for the last three weeks, I have had three breakouts in now four weeks.  It is, at the least, annoying; not to mention, VERY unattractive!  And panic attacks....those started up with a vengeance yesterday.  It's as if my body is saying, "ENOUGH!" "Be still..."

I have one month left of work.  I plan to return in the fall, yet I am beginning to think that God wants me to move on -- He's speaking to my soul.  Work on your own terms instead of someone else's.  I know another ten years of this and I will be spent to the very core.  My colleagues are all exhausted, so it's not just me.  It is, unfortunately,  the profession.  But for the fact I have to eat, I would step out and move on.   I need to trust more.  "Be still and know..."

So today is a day of renewal.  The very fiber of my being has been craving a do-nothing day.  Listening to the rain is a reminder that we all need renewal -- not just the flowers and trees, but us; God's very special creatures.  I will read and drink coffee.  Curl up under blankets and watch some movies.  Listen to the rain beating on the roof.  It is the kind of day that God is reminding me... He is speaking to my heart..."Be still and know that I AM God." Psalm 46:10

#hope #healing #encouragement

 

 

I woke up the other morning and it was finally there...forgiveness.  Whole and complete.  I realized that the things that happened in my marriage were no longer an issue in my life.  I felt good!  How did I get to this place?

I have, in the past, found myself forgiving others and moving on.  No, you can't always forgive the action but rather the person.  God will take care of the rest -- at least, in my humble opinion.  Yet, when it came to my marriage, things kept coming up.  Anger over allowing myself to be manipulated, rage because of court orders that were ignored, my having to file bankruptcy, and the list goes on.  At the end of the day, I was giving my ex the power -- the power to continue to hold me prisoner by my emotions.  And so, I realized that I hadn't truly forgiven him; for the opposite of love is not hate but rather, indifference.  No, I had not forgiven completely.

There were days when I questioned leaving him; despite all that had transpired in 30 years, there was still guilt and sadness over my decision.  I missed being a family unit despite being in a wonderful relationship with an incredibly loving man.

And so, I did the only thing I knew how to do -- I turned it all over to God.  I prayed God would help me forgive this man.  Regardless of what he did (and continues to do to me), that I could forgive him completely.  God allowed that healing to take place.  He showed me pictures of myself from years past on Facebook.  The sadness in my eyes that did not match the smile.  The smirk on my ex's face.  Neither of us was happy -- that was certainly clear.  Although more than five years have passed, I look younger today -- even with gray hair.  I have peace and happiness on my face.  It shows.  Despite what I've been through, I have moved forward.  I am in a good place. 

The family dynamics have certainly changed.  My children may or may not accept the man I am with; that is certainly their decision.  They are adults.  At the end of the day, I think they will see my happiness and understand that it is something we all deserve. Despite a large age difference, we are on the same page when it comes to big matters..  Life is not perfect but I have someone to lean on when I need to navigate through rough waters; likewise for him.  And of course, God is at the forefront of this relationship.

So, for those who are newly divorced or contemplating divorce, know that it does not come without a price; forgiveness.  Forgiving not only your ex or soon-to-be,  as well as yourself.  It takes time to work through everything but at the end of the day, turn it over to God.  With Him, there is #hope, #healing and #encouragement.

Some Bible verses to help you through those rocky times:

"Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone.  Forgive as the Lord forgave you."  Colossians 3:13

"He will wipe every tear from their eyes.  There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away."  Revelation 21:4

"The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." Psalm 34:18

"My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever." Psalm 73:26

"Have I not commanded you?  Be strong and courageous.  Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged for the LORD your God will be with you, wherever you go."  Joshua 1:9

As I See It

#Oola.  Read that statement above and you will see the gist of this word.  It comes from the word "ooh-la-la".  I've been asked, "Is this a cult?"  "What does it mean?"  "Why do you believe in this?" "Why go to Oolapalooza?"  "What exactly is this Oola stuff?"

Yes, I've been asked it all.  It's about changing the world in a positive way. Although the name sounds "new age", it's not.  It is founded on the belief that you should become the very best God intended you to be so you can help others.   Jesus himself says it in Matthew 22:3 "Love your neighbor as you love yourself." 

At the last Oolapalooza, I began too jot down Bible verses that coincided with their talks about Oola accelerators; things that help you get the life you deserve.

Gratitude.  "Be thankful in all circumstances for this is your will in Christ Jesus." 1 Thessalonians 5:18
Love.  "Love your neighbor as yourself."  Matthew 22:39 
Discipline. "For God has not given us a spirit of timidity, but of power and love and discipline." 
2 Timothy 1:7 
Integrity.  "Joyful are people of integrity, who follow the instructions of the LORD."   Psalm 119:1  Passion.  "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."  Philippians 4:13
Humility.   "And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God."  Micah 6:8 
Wisdom.  "Listen to advice and accept instruction, that you may gain wisdom in the future." Proverbs 19:30

And so, for those who think that this is a cult or new age or anything in between, all you have to do is pick up your Bible.  Read it.  Theirs is a message that is empowering, inspiring and can help you move from a life of selfishness to a life of selflessness.

Is it possible to change the world?  Indeed!  Jesus said it best.  " Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there,' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you."  Matthew 17:20


"More Than You Think I Am" by Danny Gokey
https://youtu.be/ea-TRh5RYCY?list=RDea-TRh5RYCY

Life is Fleeting

Today, I got some bad news...someone's teenage son passed away.  Another friend's husband had an ablation to the heart -  he's 61 years young and in fantastic physical shape.  A child at my school has leukemia.  Prince dies at 57.   A premature baby passes away.   The list goes on.

Why do we all expect we will live to a ripe old age?  Why are we living life like we will?  The truth is, no one knows when God will say, "it's time".  We can hope to live to be 80 or 90 years old but the truth is, we haven't a clue.


So, here's my question to you today.  Are you living life?  I mean, REALLY living life and not just going through the motions?  I'm not talking about going out and partying but rather, taking time to enjoy all things before you; sunny days, a cup of coffee, a bubble bath, the birds singing, a roof over your head?

God created this amazing world.  We are here for a reason and a purpose.  You heard me...you are here for a PURPOSE.   If you have not found your purpose yet, that's okay.  Just keep searching.  Start by looking at what you are good at; is it music, art, writing, helping others, teaching, praying?  Most likely, the gifts God has provided you with have something to do with your purpose on this Earth.

As you take time to explore the possibilities, pray about it.  Read the Bible and see if you get any clarity.  God will let you know in your heart EXACTLY where you're supposed to be.  Don't get me wrong....sometimes this process can take years.  BUT, God will keep you here exactly as long as He needs you -- not a minute longer or less.

Live life, but live it with purpose and intentionality.  "But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well."  Matthew 6:33 (NIV)

We all have much to share.  God created us to do it.  It's how we make this world a better place; not just while we're here but to live on in perpetuity. 

"Change the World" by Eric Clapton
https://youtu.be/YmnUBCXWzXA

What are YOUR Financial Goals?

Teacher burn-out.  It happens to the best of us.  When I was in school, I was told it would hit between years five and eight; however, if you got past your eighth year, you would last forever.  It hit me two years ago -- year seven.  I have hung in there and am now finishing up my eighth year.  Years six, seven and eight coincide with my having worked summer school, so I am wondering if that has something to do with it.  I'm not sure.

Don't get me wrong.  I love the kids.  I love teaching.  The problem is that it is no longer about that; it has become about budgets, latest educational trends and circumstances that are dictated by those that are not in education.  It is parents who think special education is free tutoring, teachers who are unable to give a child time to develop at their own pace because of the break-neck speed at which they have to teach in order to keep up with the demands placed on them.  It is about the mountains of paperwork, endless meetings and countless demands placed on us as educators.  It is about the lack of respect that we get, despite the fact most of us hold Master's degrees and have paid dearly for them, despite a menial salary.

"But you only work 7 hour days!  And you're off all summer!"  I beg to differ.  There are many of us that hold second jobs and work summer school, just to pay our bills.  Or declare bankruptcy, as I was forced to do because I could no longer keep up with my bills despite working three jobs post-divorce without it taking a toll on my health.  I'm fifty-six years old and I can no longer keep up with that pace.  I'm not an anomaly, in that respect.

I don't ask for sympathy.  I went into education at a later age, because I loved children and teaching.  I wanted to make a difference.  I didn't get that satisfaction in the corporate world, even though my salary was triple what I made when I started teaching.  Now, I am rethinking that decision.  I am only eight years into teaching and have over $100K in student loans.  Interest is accumulating daily.    Working the day-to-day is not going to pay those off.  I could resign myself to working until I drop.  That is a distinct possibility.   The other possibility is to start a side business and when the income surpasses my teaching income, leave the profession.  I have decided to do the latter.

I am a very deliberate person, with a keen eye for business.  I know a good opportunity when I see it.  I also have to believe in the product to sell it.  I have found that in Young Living Essential Oils.  This is not an overnight gig.  In business, you bust your tail off.  It takes time, effort and goal-setting.  I, for one, am willing to do all of the above.  Young Living is only the start; I plan to also become a consultant for Rodan + Fields.  Again, another company whose product I can get behind. 

Having an entrepreneurial spirit is not easy but to me, it is fun!  I enjoy showcasing the products I love and the best part of this, is helping others get on their feet financially.  I predict within five years, I will be financially free.  I know I can do this.  It is what I want more than anything! 

So, what are your financial goals?  Have you thought about them?  Sit down and make a list of all of your debt.  And then, I challenge you to develop a plan for attacking it.  Personally, I recommend Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University.  It helped me tremendously.  Prior to taking the class, I didn't even know how to write a budget.  I do now and more importantly, know how to stick with it.

Life is good but it will be better.  It takes time to get on your feet, especially if you have gone through a financially catastrophic experience.  Take an hour today and assess where you are financially.  There is no good or bad.  It is, what it is.  Then, take action.  Go to www.daveramsey.com  You can buy his book or take his course.  It doesn't matter because all of his advice is sound.  And then, move forward, so you can live the life you deserve.

 "Live like no other, so you can live like no other." --Dave Ramsey

Power Play

Today, I'm going to talk about the scars of emotional abuse.  Men and women alike may suffer at the hands of someone who is controlling and manipulative.  I lived with such a person for over 30 years.  I pray this doesn't come off as spiteful and vindictive but rather, a cautionary tale for those who are in questionable relationships.

My experience began with being sexually assaulted by him and went downhill from there.  Why did I stay with him?  Fear.  Shame.  Degradation. No self-esteem.  A dysfunctional family life.  There are many reasons, some known others unknown, as to why someone would stay with someone after being physically harmed.   All I know is that, at the time it happened, I had a choice to leave his apartment -- 10 miles from my apartment -- no cell phones back in those days -- or stay.  I stayed.  I remember shaking and being, probably in shock.  He explained it away as he often did, saying that he was "high".  It was true.  He'd been drinking codeine all afternoon.  Throughout our marriage, he denied the incident until he confirmed it via text about a year after our divorce.  Of course, he manipulated our son into giving my phone to him, but that's another story for another day.

I write these things not to spite him but rather to point out -- if you have been abused in some way -- GET OUT!  It does not get any better.  Trust me on this.

Did I fear him?  Perhaps -- but it came to a head when I wanted to leave him at the 10 year mark.  At that point, he told me he would take our kids overseas to his home country and I would never see them again.  His voice -- his face --I knew it was true.  He later recanted and said he wouldn't have done that.  However, let's look at what he's done post-divorce and see what you think?

1.  Changed dates he pays alimony from 2X a month to 1X a month.  That saves him 1 month of alimony.
2.  Stopped paying for kids health insurance.
3.  Stopped paying on student loans even though the court says he is to pay half, leaving me with all of them.
4.  Denied not paying student loans, causing them to default and leaving me holding the bag.
5.  Blocking me on his phone so I am unable to communicate with him about any of these matters.
6.  Stopped paying spousal support.

It is,  his way of continuing to control and manipulate me.  However, what he has not banked on is the fact that he can no longer control me.  He can no longer manipulate the situation.  We are going to court.  Not something I enjoy because it takes a lot of emotional energy and money.   However, the divorce decree speaks for itself and each of these points has been addressed.  Frankly, I have tried to be nice for the sake of our children (even though they are adults) but I am done. 

Remember three years ago when I said I was done?  I walked out then.  And just like then, I am now ready to go back and fight again.  It takes a lot of energy to deal with a person like this.  They are self-centered and will stop at nothing just to spite you. 

It doesn't get better.  Look at the signs of emotional abuse.  It leaves scars and it can take years to heal.  I am telling you now, that emotional abuse is insidious because it doesn't leave physical marks but it is just as painful. 

As for me, I closed my eyes to it all and just moved through life to avoid confronting him.  I was miserable.  In retrospect, I am glad I waited until my kids were grown to leave him.  It was over 30 years.  Although I remember the life I lived, I cannot conceive of it.  I look at pictures of me and I am a different person.  I was miserable and depressed all the time.  My kids and work were the only things that kept me sane.

I am happy now.  I am with someone who respects me and whose company I enjoy.  He makes me laugh.  However, even if I were alone, it would be preferable to my previous life. 

If you feel like you don't have the strength, begin to develop a support system.  It does not have to be a counselor, but a pastor, church family, trusted work colleague, a shelter for those who've suffered abuse.  It is time to shine the light and get out from the darkness.  It is never too late.  Reach out to those who can help.  I know fear, shame and uncertainty kept me in my marriage until it became unbearable.  You are strong....you are courageous...and God is with you. 

Here are some encouraging Bible verses on strength:

Isaiah 41:10  fear not, for I am with you;  be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you,  I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

Philippians 4:13  I can do all things through him who strengthens me.

Joshua 1: 9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go.”
Matthew 17:20  He said to them, “Because of your little faith. For truly, I say to you, if you have faith like a grain of mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move, and nothing will be impossible for you.”

Deuteronomy 31:6   Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the LORD your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.”

Essential Oils 911

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These past two weeks have been crazy!  I have been sucking down caffeine by the gallon.  If I could've run an IV drip, I most certainly would have.  The truth is, although there are 8 weeks left of school, they are probably some of the most hectic in the life of a special educator.  My dance card is filled for the entire month of April with IEP (Individualized Education Plan) meetings.  If I'm not holding them, I am participating as what we call an LEA (and don't ask me what that means!).  In short, I read the parents their rights and make sure that all laws are followed as they pertain to an IEP meeting.  I also need to assess all the students with upcoming meetings, as well as perform my regular school duties. Sound hectic?  It is!  As a result, I generally find myself on the receiving end of cold sores.

Now, I've had these in the past; however, this week-end was the monster of all outbreaks.   Half of my upper lip was covered.  I looked like I had gone to a bad plastic surgeon for some lip filler, not to mention, I could barely talk because they hurt!   I called my daughter about my predicament, and she suggested breaking out the essential oils.  Now, before the days of anti-viral creams, back in ye olde days when I grew up, we used a product called "Campho-Phenique" for anything from cold sores to bug bites.  So I thought, why not?

Turns out, using Lavender and Frankincense did the trick.  I applied a drop or two with a Q-tip several times yesterday.  Today, I woke up to a mouth with dried up sores.  Now, I'm not saying don't consult with a physician for such things as genital herpes or shingles but for a simple remedy without all the heavy-duty meds and potential side-effects, this seemed to do the trick.   I also have a friend who swears by Lavender Oil for bug bites.  Since we don't get mosquitos in Nevada, I will have to take her word for it.  However, I did order her a bottle for the upcoming summer months.

Please don't misunderstand....the FDA does not approve essential oils as medicine.  However, to support and promote a healthier lifestyle, these are great!  If you've never considered using essential oils, I suggest you do.  And Young Living (in my humble opinion) is the best because their oils are therapeutic grade.  More on this in another blog.

For now, I can smile, talk and I look 100% better today.  As for my calves, that's another story...I walked several miles this week-end; a little Peppermint and PanAway should help!  And yes, will be diffusing some Joy and Lavender today;  for what else?  Joy and relaxation.  You see, essential oils have a plethora of uses.  I am just at the beginning of my journey. 

Join me and let's not just live a healthier lifestyle but secure a healthier financial future.  Contact me and let's help others; not only with their lifestyle choices but with building a road to financial freedom.  Starter kits are $160 and I will give a $25 Visa card to those who join my team in the next month.  You have nothing to lose and everything to gain.  All information you need can be found on my website at www.yldist.com/lisalehr 

Essential Oils: The Series

About a year ago, I signed on with Young Living Essential Oils to be a distributor of their products.  Little did I know, it would be life-changing!

Some folks may not know the difference in essential oils and that's okay. I'm going to be writing and explaining differences in grades and what makes Young Living such an incredible company.  I am also going to explain how I got hooked on them.

I know it sounds incredibly "new age" but in actuality, many oils were used back in Jesus time and before.  Before modern medicine, how do you think people treated illness?  Now, don't misunderstand - I don't think that essential oils are to be used in lieu of modern medicine; however, I do believe they can be used to support and promote a healthier lifestyle. 

For myself?  When I ordered my kit a year ago, I was at a complete loss!  I opened the box and said, "Now what?"   I had no idea where to even begin.  10 oils and a diffuser -- what was I to do with them?  So, I did what any person who was clueless would do and put the box in my laundry room for six months or so.

One day, I came home from work, stressed to the max!  I texted my sponsor and said, "Is there an oil for that?"  She gave me the name of one and yes, I was forced to break out the diffuser and learn how to use it; which in actuality, was quite easy.  I diffused the scent.  Slowly, I felt myself unwind.  It was an incredibly pleasant experience.  "Hmmm, " I thought to myself.  "Maybe there is something to these oils?"

I began to experiment with diffusing them.  Then, I began using them little by little in different ways.  At the last Oolapalooza, I found some excellent resources to help me with my business.  I have also joined a team in Young Living and plan to build my own team.  I know this is a business I can get behind because I believe in these products.

For those of you who are interested in more information, go to my webpage www.yldis.com/lisalehr   Join me on this journey...together, let's make a difference in the lives of others!