Today is one of those days where it is absolutely pouring rain. I love it! The doors are open and the air is fresh! It is a reminder to take it easy.
It has been a busy month. I cannot believe April is over. It was a flurry of moving and work. Little time for socializing. There was (and still is) much to be done. But today it's as if God gave me permission to just "kick back". He knew I wouldn't otherwise; you see, I'd had a garage sale planned for today. "Be..."
Thursday, I was home from work...a casualty of overwork. A migraine headache that escalated from pain to full-blown nausea. I had to stop for the day. I rested all day and watched silly reality shows. Yesterday, I went back -- full-speed ahead. Another casualty of stress? Cold sores. Despite taking a preventative dose of Valtrex for the last three weeks, I have had three breakouts in now four weeks. It is, at the least, annoying; not to mention, VERY unattractive! And panic attacks....those started up with a vengeance yesterday. It's as if my body is saying, "ENOUGH!" "Be still..."
I have one month left of work. I plan to return in the fall, yet I am beginning to think that God wants me to move on -- He's speaking to my soul. Work on your own terms instead of someone else's. I know another ten years of this and I will be spent to the very core. My colleagues are all exhausted, so it's not just me. It is, unfortunately, the profession. But for the fact I have to eat, I would step out and move on. I need to trust more. "Be still and know..."
So today is a day of renewal. The very fiber of my being has been craving a do-nothing day. Listening to the rain is a reminder that we all need renewal -- not just the flowers and trees, but us; God's very special creatures. I will read and drink coffee. Curl up under blankets and watch some movies. Listen to the rain beating on the roof. It is the kind of day that God is reminding me... He is speaking to my heart..."Be still and know that I AM God." Psalm 46:10
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