Oola Goals

So, I have been re-reading my Oola goals from last year.  I have quite a few that I have completed, although not in a way I would have imagined.  I'm going to recap my year, based on my goals for 2016.

Let's look at what I haven't accomplished first...It's always easier to end on a positive note.  Additionally, I want to point out that 2016 is not over yet.  And so, although I am not where I want to be YET, it doesn't mean I won't get there.

Fitness:  Lose 60 lbs.  I have actually modified that goal to be in a size 10 by Christmas.  I am actively pursuing it is all I can say and so far, so good.

Field:  Publish my journals.  Okay, well that may or may not happen this year.  The jury is out on that one.  I also wanted my block readership to be between 4,000-6,000 readers per month.  However, it takes an inordinate amount of time to write and post blogs.  It really isn't reasonable to have that kind of readership unless you are pursuing it full-time, which I'm not.   I have a "real" job which keeps me afloat.  On the positive side, I do have a radio interview lined up for May 11 to talk about my blogging.  Additionally, I have changed jobs this year and am incredibly happy where I am.  Changing schools is never easy but I knew the minute I spoke with the principal that this was "home".

Fun:  Okay, so I haven't zip-lined yet and certainly not in Hawaii.  However, I am hoping to travel to Utah this fall to make it happen.  And if not, there's always Fremont Street.  I did manage several trips this year.  No, not Bend, Oregon as I had hoped but did go to San Diego, California -- where I'd never been, and to St. Louis.  I also managed to meet the date requirement of two times per month.

Friends:  I said I would do a random act of kindness for a friend, once a month.  I'm not sure if telling someone they look gorgeous qualifies but I did it regularly and with sincerity.  I had promised myself I would exercise with a friend three times a week.  That really didn't happen although in summer, I was doing it twice a week.  So close...Also, to remove negative people from my life.  That has been done.

Family:  I promised to support my transgender daughter and to let go of any pain immediately.  If anyone in the family caused me pain, I was to forgive and forget it immediately.  I did that and I do believe that those relationships are better.  I also try to see my daughters and their families twice a year.   And yes, that has happened.

Finance:  Well, it has been hard to recoup a financially devastating divorce.  However, I am slowly making ground.  I have increased my life insurance, been investing in a 403B, which for now is my emergency fund.  I hope I never have to dig into it before I retire.  I also planned to make a will.  That is going to happen by the end of this year.

Faith:  Increase my prayer time and Bible study as well as write down 3 things I am grateful for daily.  Truth is, I know I am incredibly blessed and on the hard days, I am very specific about looking at all the things I have to be grateful for.  I also pray intentionally every morning and instead of doing a Bible study, I am facilitating one.  It is the Old Testament and I do it twice a week, in order to allow the maximum number of people who want to attend to be able to.  Am I tired?  Absolutely!  But the positive is that I know how grateful the folks are that are in the study that it is offered.  I have also learned a lot as well.  Last week, we read 50 chapters in Genesis.  It was a lot of work but I also feel enormously blessed that I was able to do it.

At the end of the day, I feel like I am making headway.  Some days, it doesn't feel like much but it is a steady progression and that's what Oola's about; progress, not perfection.  My fiance is not much into Oola because he has had the hard-driving career.  He feels like he has reached his Oola life.  As for me, I am still a work in progress.  I'm not sure when I will be satisfied but I know I will continue in order to be the best that I can be; after all, that's what being Oola is all about.

Persistance

I want to share a story with you.  A friend of mine applied with a school district as a teacher.  He took classes for their alternate route to obtaining a license.  He passed all the Praxis teaching exams for both content and methods of teaching.  He also subbed for all but a few weeks last year.  At the end of June, he received a letter stating that there were "more qualified applicants" and a thank you for applying.  Yesterday, he got his teaching contract.  What made the district change their mind?  Persistence!

You see, in June, he could have called it a day and said, "Ok, I gave it my best shot!"  Instead, he refused to take "no" for an answer.  He reached out to people who were higher up.  He asked the hard questions to the "right" people.  He also kept a positive attitude.

Now, I like to think I have a positive attitude.  But, this guy was unstoppable.  He didn't say, "if" I get hired; he said "when".  He never once faltered in his belief to be hired as a teacher.  I must confess, there were moments when I had my doubts but I figured, "he'll see".  He saw, alright...He came... he saw...and he conquered!

I have to tell you...I love that indomitable spirit!  It is uplifting.  It makes me realize that we all have the power within us, if we not only believe but act on that belief.  I personally would never have imagined this happening in my wildest dreams; yet, it did.

So, the next time you are ready to give up...don't!  Follow your heart.  Chase your dreams!  Persistence pays!  Ready, set, go!  I dare you!  And while you're at it?  Don't you think of stopping for one second until you reach your goal!  Not "it might happen" but "it will happen!"

Humility

I'm in a challenge, and today's challenge is about humility.  I checked Bible verses and lo and behold, there are many.  So today, I'm here to tell you about one of the most humbling experiences of my life.

Three years ago, I went through a divorce.  But, here's the caveat.  I was left without any money.  This may seem like the story of so many.  However, I was a trust fund baby.  My father left me a substantial amount of money, as did my mother.  So, how did I end up selling jewelry to make ends meet post-divorce?

This experience was indeed humbling.  First of all, I could not bring myself to tell my sister that I was getting divorced, let alone that I was broke.  I couldn't bear to hear about how foolish I'd been.  It took me many months for me to "cop" to what had happened.

Truth is, my foolishness lay in the fact that I buried my head in the sand.   I knew that I was using the money to live on; my spouse was unable to keep a job and I never made enough to feed a family of six.   I also willingly helped my now ex-husband get set up in business.  I wanted to keep the marriage together so that his idealizations of taking our children overseas would not come to fruition.  I also stayed because my youngest, at the age of 14, announced  how terrible it is for parents to divorce.  Perhaps, he had an inkling.

The truth is, despite all my ex had done to me, I likewise had my own faults.  I had no idea what a relationship involved, nor did I have an understanding of love.  You see, at 21, I don't believe I was capable of love.  My own parents went through a bitter divorce after a lifetime of fighting.  Love was never modeled at my house.

When we were engaged, there was a time I wanted to call off the engagement.  My soon-to-be- husband insisted that he loved me. The "people pleaser" in me agreed to put my ring back on.  Then, a day or so before the marriage, as people were arriving from out of town, I got cold feet.  I went through with the wedding because I knew my father had spent a lot of money, shelling out deposits.  Again, the "people pleaser" came out.  I walked down that aisle and said, "I do".

At the end of the day, I don't regret my marriage.  We had four amazing children, and now have seven grandchildren, who are the apples of my eye.  I definitely regret the fallout of the divorce but not the divorce itself.   If you want to be humbled, go from being a trust fund baby to bankrupt.  Now THAT is humbling.  However, I also believe in God and his grace.  He had me go through all of this for a reason.  I am sorry for the hurt and animosity between my ex and myself.  I have extended the olive branch but he does not want it.

I continue to live with nightmares about my past life however, they are lessening.  I hope one day I can sleep without reliving the past.  For now, I live everyday with renewed joy.  God has humbled me in a mighty way.  I thank Him for allowing me to learn how to love and to become whole.  Humility.  A lesson we can all learn.

Closer

This past month, I had some interesting things happen in the area of my faith.  I spoke with my pastor about why I could not discern anything and he said it was because my mind was focused on so many other things that I could not hear God's voice.  He was right.  I went to my counselor and poured out my heart.  After that, I began to hear God's voice again.

12 You have been believers so long now that you ought to be teaching others. Instead, you need someone to teach you again the basic things about God’s word.[a] You are like babies who need milk and cannot eat solid food. 13 For someone who lives on milk is still an infant and doesn’t know how to do what is right. 14 Solid food is for those who are mature, who through training have the skill to recognize the difference between right and wrong. Hebrews 5:12-18 (New Living Translation)
He has been trying to tell me some really important things; things I lost sight of these past few months.  I have been conforming to the world rather than listening to Him. And what He has to say is important.

"Don't copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God's will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect." Romans 12:2 (New Living Translation)
Last night I had a dream.  I have not had a dream about God in I don't know how long.  In my dream, I asked him to carry me home.  As I was flying, I was praising Him.  I went back later to the spot where He started carrying me and there were crosses on the ground; crystal, gold, large, small; beautiful crosses that I began to pick up.  As I wandered further along, the crosses became larger and looked more like tablets with Hebrew written on them.  I don't speak Hebrew but there was one that said in English "read the Book".

God is definitely speaking to me.  I heard Him in church yesterday.  As my pastor speaks, I hear God in my heart.  Yesterday in church was to me, incredibly joyful!  The music, the prayers, the worship, the fellowship.   It all comes together for me.

This next week, I will begin facilitating a Bible study on the old Testament.  I am a little anxious about it, as people who have facilitated studies for me will be in there; but I am ready.  God wants me to lead it for whatever reason and I am down for it.

So if you are struggling in your faith and either not growing, not enthusiastic or not learning, then look at your life.  Look at the things that weigh on your heart.  If you have a heart that is full of "stuff", how can the Holy Spirit reside there?   Our heart is the temple of the Holy Spirit.

10 But[a] it was to us that God revealed these things by his Spirit. For his Spirit searches out everything and shows us God’s deep secrets. 1 Corinthians 2:10 (New Living Translation)

I have found that out as I continue my faith-filled journey.  Thank you, Pastor, for your words of advice; timely and true.

The World Today

Today, I am bombarded with news reports that I just can't even process.  It is overwhelming.  The world is seriously broken.  I want to say, "God, where are you in all of this?  Don't you see what's happening?"  And all I hear is "I am in the midst."

There are days I want to scream and cry.  "Lord, heal us!"  I hear Him saying, "I've given you everything you need.  I am here but many have rejected me.  You make a mockery of who I am.  I AM the great I AM."

But didn't Jesus say, "forgive them, they don't know what they're doing?"  "He did...you have had more than 2000 years to come to Christ.  He is the Way to Me."

Lord, I get that.  I really do.  But what about the people who have grown up in places where Christianity is not known to them?  Maybe they grew up in a household where Christ wasn't talked about?  "I send missionaries to the far reaches of the world...people who are brave enough to stand on my Truth.  You are the church...what are YOU doing to help others come to Christ?"

God, I'm doing what I can.  "Are you?  Are you really?  My Son gave up His life for you.  All He asks is that you pick up your cross and follow Him.  Are you doing that?"

Think about it.