I want to share what I hope is encouragement for those who are feeling discouraged; those who are struggling with life. I have been there. I still have my ups and downs, despite the fact that my divorce has been final for nearly a year. Some days are harder than others and yet, I push through because I have my boys, who live with me. I have my daughters, who although out of state, rely on me for advice and motherly love. I have my grandchildren who, well frankly, need a grandma to love and spoil them, even if it is only once or twice a year.
This past week was not an easy one. I had issues with my ex husband, issues with people I was dating, issues with students -- it seemed like it was just one thing after another. Yet, there were also many blessings.
I was blessed by an audiologist who wrote off over $1000 on my bill, so that I could get much-needed hearing aids without paying anything out of pocket. I did not ask for it; he offered. Apparently, I have a genetic hearing problem; would explain why I didn't talk until I was four. My hearing became so bad that I was struggling at work to hear my students. I decided it was time. My insurance covers $2000 toward a pair of hearing aides, which are terribly expensive. I went with the cheapest ones; and yet, they were still unaffordable. And yet, He made it so.
I made a new friend at DivorceCare; a woman who shares many commonalities with me. More importantly, who was willing to stay late and pray with me on Monday night. Her prayers were like music to my ears. He put the Holy Spirit in her heart to pour out such incredible praises, requests and thanksgiving.
I called a student loan company in order to figure out how I am going to get out of debt from these student loans which seem to bind me to my ex-husband forever. Divorce did not end that prison sentence; I am now shackled to him by financial issues and truly at his mercy as to whether or not he chooses to pay, despite court orders. The man I spoke with was incredibly kind, and said he felt the Holy Spirit telling him to give me a one year deferment by phone. He told me that he wanted that to be an encouragement to me. He whispered to that man to give me hope.
I called a creditor yesterday. After a year, I'm still trying to get on my feet and make things right. They are allowing me to make payments that are about 2/3 lower than what they originally wanted. He softened their hearts.
My accountant and his wife, who so generously gave me a large discount on my fees. Again without my asking. He whispered in their hearts that this is help I needed at this time.
A friend who will offer encouraging words and listen to me complain ad infinitum when I have a rough week -- without any judgment whatsoever. Someone who listens and gives of his time willingly; and can make me smile even when I feel like crying. He gave him a heart to inspire others.
How can I thank all these people who have so generously given their time and helped in ways that I cannot even fathom. Words cannot even express the outpouring of my heart. All I can do is say "thank you" and "God bless you" -- words that almost sound less than sincere; and yet, they're not. More importantly, how can I even begin to express to others how much my faith means to me and how real He is? That He is there -- watching over me ever so lovingly. More so than anyone on this earth possibly could. And yet, He whispers in their ears, their hearts, their minds -- He uses them as a connection to me.
This past year and a half has seen me on my knees more times than I care to count. I have cried more during my divorce and after it, than I have in the 52 years preceding it. And yet, God is there
I have no doubts. He knows my pain. He sends angels to lift me up -- encourage -- build me up in His holy name. For those who doubt that God is there or that he doesn't exist....I encourage you to really pray about this -- even if you don't believe. Pray for the Holy Spirit to come into your heart; He will.
By the way, He's not just there for the bad times; He's also there for the good. And yes, He provides me with many wondrous sights to behold.
My daughter had a baby yesterday -- my fifth grandchild. Although a long and somewhat tense delivery from my end, mom and baby are doing well. A healthy and beautiful baby girl. He blessed me richly.
The students that I have been tutoring for nearly a year, are just now starting to trust. They laugh and have a good time while getting their work done. They have gone from all F's on their report cards to higher grades in 2-3 subjects. He allowed me to see miraculous changes in these special children.
A child I was working with who struggles with reading. I listened to him read -- really listened and realized it is not a reading problem but a speech problem. God put me in that circumstance to point that out to his guardians.
The blind girl who danced at today's pep assembly when she heard the music; such rhythmic movements. Even in blindness, there is joy. Who but God can make us see -- really see -- the gift of that child's spirit brought out by the sound of music?
People we've prayed for through the prayer team I serve on; God shows us miracles all the time. People who have a poor prognosis will recover, baffling their doctors. Marriages that are broken become healed. People dealing with addictions break the cycle and are clean. Abuse victims who are finally healed from their post traumatic stress disorder. The list goes on. He shows us not just the power of prayer but His healing power.
He IS there. He holds us -- through the arms of another. When we struggle to walk on a rocky road, He steadies us by sending someone who has walked down that very same path. When we can't see through the tears, He wipes our eyes with prayers that others offer us, healing the pain in our hearts. When we are in the very pit and it's dark and we can't see the light, He sends us a beacon of hope; Jesus.
I write these words to offer comfort. I know I had a rough week. I also know that God continues to be in the midst. Despite my week, today is a good day. I saw the face of God and all His glory. Knowing that offers me comfort. It offers me hope. I pray it offers you the same. Be blessed by the knowledge that He is with you, wherever you are...
God's Not Dead: http://youtu.be/CgTx8KOsRRw
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