How many of you eat because you're depressed, bored, anxious or a host of other feelings? I know because I used to be an emotional eater. I was a late bloomer. It began in my 40's when I was an insurance agent and owned my own agency. I was incredibly successful at work in the day but at night I raided a walk-in pantry and ate away the frustrations of the day. It was a terrible habit to get into, and even harder to break. In fact, I did not get away from that habit until this past year which was thirteen years later. How did I do it? I had to mentally ask myself, "Does eating really solve this problem or make things worse? Will the extra weight you gain be worth it?" The truth is, it only compounded the problem. One of my bigger struggles was being depressed about my weight. And so, this hamster wheel I was on, finally came to a dead stop. Now, don't mistake the fact that I got rid of that problem as something that was easy to do. It wasn't. I am on a food plan that reduces my cravings for sugar. Since those were the worst cravings, it helped immensely with getting past emotional eating.
The other part to this complex problem, was the fact that my self-esteem, on a scale of 1-10, was in the negative numbers. I felt worthless on so many levels and being overweight compounded the problem. I was, in a word, depressed. The more I ate, the guiltier I felt and I continued to feel full of self-doubt. It was a horrific cycle. As I was going through my divorce, I realized I was not going to survive unless I pulled myself together, and that included actually using an anti-depressant. I have to admit, I used to think that using anti-depressants were a sign of weakness; that somehow, I should be able to handle all that was thrown at me, and if I couldn't, I was lacking something. It was admitting that I had a "problem".
The truth is, I was depressed and needed medication. It was not a sign of weakness; rather it was a chemical imbalance. The first time I took the medication, I was shaking; scared. What if it screwed up my brain? Yet, I knew that I was in a place where I had hit rock bottom and that the only way out was up. I took the medication and sought professional counseling.
Fast forward three years. I am now at a place in my life where I would not go back; in fact, I don't even look back unless people ask about my testimony. I have accomplished things I never dreamed possible; one of which is losing weight. I continue on this journey and know that my goal of five pounds per month is completely reasonable and doable. Anything more than that is a gift and I will accept it gratefully. My next step in this journey is to start exercising regularly. I don't know that I will ever be off of my medication or cease seeing my counselor, but I know exercise helps with mental clarity, flexibility and increased health; all things this "old lady" aspires to.
As for those of you who think exercise is impossible, think again. My uncle, in his sixties, walked 10-15 miles a day AFTER work, which were frequently 16 hour days. In his 70's, when he retired, he cut back to 5 miles a day. Now, even after having a stroke and in his mid-eighties, walks two miles every single day. He lives in an area that has snow and he does all his walking at the mall before it opens. He does it in less than an hour. He is, in fact, one of my heroes. He has shown me that exercise is possible regardless of your age; it is just a matter of priority.
And so now, it is time to get my priorities in order. I have focused on my mental health for a very long time. It was incredibly important so that I could be in a place where I could focus on the physical. Let's face it; if you are filled with self-doubt, success will be fleeting because you will not believe you deserve it. The truth is, everyone deserves it! Fitness is just one-seventh of my Oola life, yet it has become a priority. I know for myself, physical fitness is the key to my becoming my personal best. It's what I want for myself...what about you?
Colbie Caillat "Try"
https://youtu.be/GXoZLPSw8U8
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