Visions of Sugar Plums

 

 

I hope this blog doesn't come off as trivializing the pain one can feel when they go through a life-changing circumstance.   I personally lost both my parents around the holidays.  And when I divorced, I never envisioned my life quite like this.  I had imagined my ex and I would remain friends -- that we could still celebrate holidays and be there for our children.  However, today I see a hand on a phonograph needle on a record, and sliding across the record slowly -- putting a big, deep scratch in it.  I also hear the sound that typically goes with it.  For whatever reason, that is not possible.  And I'm okay with that.  Traditions be damned..  And so, here we go -- what has become another adventure on my life journey

This Christmas was nothing like I had imagined or planned.  Last night, I was blessed with getting to watch one of my former students get married.  She was only with me a year, but we forged a bond.  Her parents are out of the country and unable to attend.  So, she asked me to attend; a last minute invitation.  I am a little teary-eyed thinking about it.  I am incredibly proud of her -- she is in the Army and a sharp-shooter.  Yes, my little 5'2" student can pack a rifle.  Something I never envisioned -- but then again, who envisions their life as anything but something out of a storybook?

Last night, I was blessed because my youngest son was with me.  I was unable to find our traditional beef tenderloin and after going to four different grocery stores said, "The hell with it!  We're going to have pizza and watch movies!"  Yes, I never EVER envisioned a Christmas Eve with that tradition.  But you know what?  I was totally down for it.  We watched "Christmas Vacation", ate our pizza and a few Christmas cookies.  We watched a Christmas drum corps video, as that's his passion.  It was a quiet night -- more importantly, it was a nice night.  I never made it to church, something that I definitely missed -- but I got to spend time with family; something so fundamentally important.  I am ever grateful for that.

Today, I picked up my oldest son.  What do you do for Christmas Day when you don't feel like cooking and live in Las Vegas?  Why, go to a buffet, of course!  Apparently, everyone leaves Las Vegas at Christmastime because let's face it.  This is definitely not a place where you want to spend the holidays.  Even the shows close down until New Year's Eve so the celebrities can spend time with their families.  Well,  Merry Christmas to us -- a buffet with no lines!   Funny, how your perspective can change after a few years out here. We had plenty to eat, great conversation and came home to some freshly brewed coffee and to open gifts sent from out-of-state relatives.

So, I guess my point today is -- what do you do when your life is turned upside down?  Whether from divorce, separation, the loss of a loved one, or any other number of other things that can impact your life so dramatically?  Do you continue as if nothing happened?  Or do you change it up a bit?  Last year, I intentionally tried to change it up.  Frankly, that didn't work as well as I had liked.  This year, I just let things happen.  I didn't have a plan to get through it -- I just did it.  When Plan A went out the window, I moved onto Plan B.  And you know what?  It was a truly amazing Christmas!  God allowed some really wonderful things to shine through in a time that could be otherwise very dark and depressing. 

And so, whether you intentionally go through the motions or just let things happen -- it doesn't matter.  What matters is spending time with those you love.  It's really not about the gifts -- trust me! Certainly, when you have smaller children -- yes, having the gifts can be important.  But my children are adults.  And we've learned in the past couple of years that, the Grinch was right -- Christmas really doesn't come from a store.  It's about God, family and friends, something good to eat and some great conversation.   We've celebrated the last two Christmases without exchanging gifts and you know what?  Those have been incredible times.  We did not get caught up in the craziness of shopping.  We did not overspend.  We did not have to deal with crowds.  Most of all, we looked to Him.  He provided us with everything.  His light shined in the darkness as He carried us through, what would otherwise have been difficult times.

So, my advice today?  Don't get caught up in the dreams of yesterday.  Live in the here and now.  Let go of the sadness, the pain, the drama, the stress and everything that has taken ahold of you.  Rather, give it all to God.  Let Him fill you up.  Life is constantly changing.  Circumstances change.  The one thing that remains constant and can be a constant in your life is your faith.  That's all that really matters.

So, spend the remaining hours of Christmas Day with your loved ones.  Get in some extra sleep.  Eat a few extra calories.  And enjoy!  Life is good.   It's your choice.  Live in the here and now or live in your dreams.  Embrace the journey -- whatever it is.  Your life -- and where you are today -- is exactly as God planned it!


"Different Kind of Christmas" by Mark Schultz

http://youtu.be/5PBEMfbWq_Y