Shades of Gray

How many of you are going to see "50 Shades of Grey?"  It's the perfect date movie, especially for Valentine's Day!  A little S & M, anyone? 

When I first heard that this movie was being released on Valentine's Day, I was appalled.  First of all, I wouldn't want to see this movie because I don't find S & M sexy.   It is not my idea of a romantic evening.   It is, in fact, degrading and demeaning.  I guess that's the purpose of it but my question is, why would anyone want to take something as beautiful as sex  and turn it into THAT?  And if a date suggested it?  I think I would have to re-evaluate the quality of the man I was spending time with. 

I must confess, when the book came out and it was being touted as a great read, I got a sample for my Nook.  However, I never read it.  I heard a friend of mine describe it as pornography -- and this lady is no prude.  So, I decided that I would not even open the sample.  Frankly, I have better things to do than to read pornography.  However, it is my understanding from the movie previews I've seen, that as long as your guy is sexy and powerful, anything goes.  That, is the underlying theme and it is scary to think that we, as a society, buy into it.

I have spent countless hours and money on a counselor to improve my self-worth and have a better understanding of who I am and my value as a child of God.  I also understand that Hollywood makes money through fantasy.  However, this movie has been rated R, which means that anyone 17 and over can see it.  And trust me, 17-year-olds, will go see it!  I guess it makes me wonder, is nothing off-limits in today's society?  I am taking enormous steps to undo the damage that was done to me over a lifetime and now people are paying for the privilege of not just watching it, but then, my best guess?  Check it out firsthand.

And so, rather than jump in and say, "What do we say to our kids about this movie?"  I'm going to take a little different stance.  What does God think about sex? 

Clearly, he's all for it.  Why?  First off, He created us as sexual beings.  No doubt about that.  Check out the design of our body.  Think about how a man's brain works versus that of a woman.   In Genesis 1:28, it says "Then God blessed them and said, “Be fruitful and multiply....”   He sanctioned it!  So, it's all well and good.  However, I don't believe the Bible says, go tie her up and whip her.  In fact, I defy anyone to find anything remotely close to that in the Bible.  You won't. 
 
The Bible also speaks about the beauty of love. Song of Solomon 1:1, 12-17 says,

"This is Solomon’s
    most beautiful song...

 

She Speaks:

¹² My king, while you
were on your couch,
    my love was a magic charm.
¹³ My darling, you are perfume
    between my breasts;
¹⁴ you are flower blossoms
    from the gardens of En-Gedi.

He Speaks:

¹⁵ My darling, you are lovely,
so very lovely—
    your eyes are those of a dove.

She Speaks:

¹⁶ My love, you are handsome,
    truly handsome—
the fresh green grass
    will be our wedding bed
¹⁷ in the shade of cedar
    and cypress trees."

 

 

OK, back in ye olde days, they compared themselves to the things they saw around them -- which were animals and fields.  Yet, I don't think it takes away the beauty of the love of these two.  What would decimate these verses is if they brought out the chariot whips and chains.

 

There are many other verses that address sexuality:

 

1 Corinthians 6:18  (CEV) "Don’t be immoral in matters of sex. That is a sin against your own body in a way that no other sin is."  In other words, you are committing acts against yourself.  Degrading another is likewise degrading to you.

 

1 Thessalonians 4:3-7 (CEV)  "God wants you to be holy, so don’t be immoral in matters of sex. ⁴ Respect and honor your wife. ⁵ Don’t be a slave of your desires or live like people who don’t know God. ⁶ You must not cheat any of the Lord’s followers in matters of sex.  Remember, we warned you that he punishes everyone who does such things. ⁷ God didn’t choose you to be filthy, but to be pure."  In other words, don't treat your woman disrespectfully in the bedroom (or anywhere else, for that matter).

 

Hebrews 13:4 (ESV)  "Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous."  I won't comment on "marriage bed" but God is saying, don't get down and dirty. 

 

I am not going to judge others on the grounds of who sleeps with whom and when.  However, I will say this.  Teenagers are impressionable.  Even at 17 years of age, they will watch this movie and their curiosity will be piqued.  I am pretty certain the sex scenes in this movie are not an attempt to discourage people from engaging in this type of sex.  I am also going to say this to the women who are single and lonely.  Don't let a man convince you to have this type of sex.  Make no mistake -- this IS bondage.  Do you want someone to hold you in low esteem and disregard?  Degrading you?  Demeaning you? 

 

The argument for this article is going to be, whatever two consenting adults do in the bedroom is their business.  However, my counter-argument would be -- yes, if we were perfect and knew all the ramifications of such actions.  The human psyche is incredibly delicate.  It is formed and developed at a very early age and continues to develop throughout life.  We learn from our experiences; good, bad or otherwise.  Sometimes, our brains compartmentalize and rationalize and we make poor life choices.  That is why we have the Bible.  It helps us see that although we as humans may want something or think we need it -- we really don't.  God gives us His handbook to help us through life.  All we have to do is read it and apply it as we interpret it.  I don't believe there is a "right or wrong" to reading Scripture.  God touches each of our hearts differently with His words.  The Bible is not black and white; there are shades of gray.  It is a book that has withstood the test of time, and can be applied even in today's day and age.  However, we need to read God's word and make the choices that empower us...through our faith.

 

"Slow Fade" by Casting Crowns

http://youtu.be/kRScqMewlD0