I am a mother. I am a grandmother. I am a teacher. Most people think of teaching as a "lesser" profession. The old "Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach those who do." mentality. I'm proud of my accomplishments and education. I'd even go so far as to say, I think it is an important job; sort of ranking up there with doctors, lawyers, pastors and other professionals. Unfortunately, teachers are not considered professionals. We are merely public servants who are often times ridiculed and demoralized for our chosen profession. We work 6 hours a day and get summers and holidays off. We sit on our behinds and have job security like no other -- NOT! Actually, we are highly trained professionals. Most of us have not one, but two master's degrees, if not our doctorate. Yet, parents seem to think it's fair game to blame the ills of their children on us.
I am a new teacher - this is my fifth year of teaching. They told us in graduate school the burnout rate was between 5-8 years for a teacher. If you could last that long, you would probably be there until retirement. I am not anywhere near burnout. I love my job! I teach special education in high school -- prior to that, I taught special education in elementary. I like high school better because we can actually watch the kids grow and develop. We will see them, often times, throughout the entire four years. They look to us for guidance, mentoring and as role models. It is a job I take very seriously. Every kid who walks through my classroom door, hears me tell them that "My goal for you is to be as successful out of school, as in school -- whatever that success means to you." It could mean attending college, community college, trade school or a job. Each child is special and unique. There is no "right" way for them to transition from high school to the "real" world. Everyone has a different skillset. I try to help them develop their strengths in order to overcome their weaknesses.
Today's teenager has a much more "worldly" viewpoint than we ever did as kids. Their education comes not from the schools but rather from the media; television, the Internet, Twitter, Facebook and other social media outlets. They have a portable computer in their hands with a cell phone and it is a no-holds barred entertainment center.
Teenagers also dress considerably different than we ever did -- the girls wear short, tight skirts and plunging necklines -- ones so low that even I am uncomfortable. I cannot imagine how the male teachers feel, especially young ones. As for the boys, ever hear the song "Pants on the Ground"? Yup, there's plenty of that. Today's term for looking good is, I believe, swag. One thing they all possess is that they look much older than they are; that's more than a little scary!
However, today's teenager deals with much more drama than we ever did. Their lives are much more complex. I'm not sure how they deal with it all; school, work, extracurricular activities and yes, the social aspect. Today's teenagers don't just work harder, I believe they party harder than we could even imagine.
But, here's the caveat; today's teenagers are also just teenagers. Their brains will not fully develop before the age of 23. Yet, they are expected to behave as adults at 18. Something, they simply are incapable of doing since their brains are underdeveloped. I don't have statistics but I dare say there is a higher rate of depression and behaviors associated with it, such as cutting. Today's children do not live in a very forgiving world. And yes, even though they are in high school, they still need nurturing to some degree.
I guess my problem with teaching is not the students but rather, the parents. You see, parents have shifted the ills of their child onto the school system. My child didn't pass because the teacher did not ____________________________. You can fill in the blank. Not every teacher is perfect, but I do believe a lot of us care. We receive subpar salaries for the level of education we have, and many of us have 2nd and 3rd jobs just to keep up with the cost of living. We don't sit on our laurels. We often times work well into the evening and on the week-ends. I tutor two times a week, just to help any student in my classes that need extra help, and it is unpaid. And I am not the only teacher who does this. I don't care if they are special needs or not. I am willing to put forth the extra effort to make sure that child will be successful. I also offer them a listening ear and support when they need it.
I would ask all parents to really consider this. It is not the job of your children's teachers to raise them. That has been given to you by their birthright. We have them just a few short hours a day and they are with 5-6 different individuals, all with different backgrounds and philosophies. Our goal is to offer your child an education. It is not our job to teach them how to dress, what to eat, who to hang out with, or supervise them other than if it is a school activity. Although we offer afterschool tutoring, it is ultimately your job to make sure your child studies or turns in their schoolwork in a timely manner. I am teaching children who have an incredible high degree of learned helplessness -- they expect everything to be handed to them. That is not how the world works! But it appears from the shows that they watch that it is. You see, even that reality show that is wasting your child's time, impacts their thought process. They are unable to distinguish the "reality" of television with the "reality" of life. Everything looks easy; too easy! They are truly unable to distinguish right from wrong many times unless they experience it; a tough lesson to learn.
What I am proposing today, is that parents take back the responsibility that they signed on for when they decided to have children. That they have dinner with their children, supervise who they hang out with and actually know where they are, make sure they do their homework and if they don't understand it, help them with it! And most importantly, spend time with them and talk to them! In other words, do your job!
This is not intended as a rant. It is intended as a plea. I look at these children everyday and wonder what the world will look like in twenty years. Will they have acquired your inattention that you used to parent with? Or will they be strong, responsible adults who raise their children with the same convictions you did, even though you went against society? I propose you read the following. It was given to me by my father when I had my first child. It served me well. My children are productive, happy and reasonably well-adjusted members of society, despite the advent of the Internet and social media. I hope and pray that yours are as well.
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