Taking Stock

THIS.  This is one of my favorite quotes.  It so eloquently describes what I have been through in the last few years.  Time is ticking for me.  I know I am getting older and I can't help wonder where I will be in a few years?

I must confess; I have often thought of giving up writing.  Yet, I continue because what if...what if this article, this blog, this book...changes my entire life?  What if I am on the pinnacle of something?

For a long time, I felt special.  I felt like, "YES!  This is going to happen!"  But some days?  Some days I find myself thinking that I am quite ordinary.  And then I wonder, "Is that so bad?"  After all, most people are ordinary.  I guess the frustration with me lies in the fact that I want to be extraordinary!

So, today I have decided it's time to take a look back to 2013 and track whether or not any real progress has been made.  In 2013, I got divorced.  I sold off all of my jewelry in order to get an apartment, put a down payment on a car and just survive.  I worked three jobs over the next two years.  I declared bankruptcy in 2015.  Hmmm, this does not look nor sound very promising.  

Moving forward...2016.  I am still in bankruptcy -- Chapter 13.  No high marks there.  However, I began writing the summer after my divorce and began a blog.  This is that blog.  I have built my readership up to over 56,000 readers worldwide. I write whenever I get a chance; in essence, it has become my second (unpaid) job.  Yet, I get immense satisfaction from it.  I have also started a second blog which has an amazing following as well.

I have met many wonderful people who have been incredible blessings in my life.  I have a roof over my head and food on my table.  I was blessed to not only visit my children and grandchildren this year but was also able to take a bona fide trip to San Diego for a few days, compliments of my significant other.  Oh and that's another thing...I got engaged last December.  No wedding plans as of yet...this girl is exceedingly gun-shy.  However, he has met my friends and family and they all seem to think he is really fun and cute -- for an old dude! (my words -- not theirs!)

I stay in touch with www.creditkarma.com and check my credit religiously.  It is, getting better.  My ex-husband has stopped paying spousal support because he can.  At this point, I have no money to go to court and so, things are tight.  However, I'm a survivor.  

I guess the bottom line is...I fell...fast and hard!  But I flew!  In this crazy world, I ...me...myself...managed to keep from completely falling on my face.   It has not been easy but darling...it has been so worthwhile!